Things Are Changing

  

Something happens as we get older. The script flips. Things that once seemed forever are now only temporary, or cease to continue. I have a few friends who are going through rough patches is their lives because they never thought that the metaphorical roof over their heads would ever collapse. 

I have a friend who lives in another country. We used to spend hours talking and laughing every day, but we heard each other’s voices at all in the past few months. He’s going through a few tough times at home and now he basically has to start his life over again. He’s moving from his house, looking for a job, and just trying to sort his life out all together. He’s even had to sell some of his most precious belongings so he can raise enough money to live the life he dreams about. Like the rest of us, I’m sure he thought that life would be straight and narrow, but that is never the case. 

There are few things in this world that are forever. Sunny days are bound to turn rainy. Rainy days are bound to turn sunny. That’s just the way the world is, has always been, and always will be. Things change, but those events do not define who we are. It’s what we do about them that make us. Sure, things may be tough for you right now, but as long as you hold your head high, stay calm, and tell yourself “I’ve got this,” then you’ll be even stronger when those stormy seas become steady once again. 

Even when things are going well, it doesn’t hurt to prepare ourselves for an unexpected event. Nobody predicts a divorce, a layoff at work, the death of a loved one, or a frozen bank account. Anything can happen at any given time.   

In the past year, I’ve meet new people and I’ve lost others. I’ve found out who my real friends are, and I found out who really didn’t deserve to be called a friend. I’ve learned to appreciate what I have now instead of wasting these precious moments living in the future. 

Life changes. Seeds grow into trees, people change addresses, and even the strongest empires will eventually crumble. No matter what challenges you may face in your life, it’s not what happens to you that matters. It’s what you do about it. And to you, dear reader, I wish you a thousand years of success and happiness. 

“How it was ain’t how it is. How it is ain’t how it will be.”

Advertisements

A Pocketful of Memories

  

“A man’s real possession is his memory. In nothing else is he rich, in nothing else is he poor.”

I just saw that quote in the intro of one of my favorite tv shows and my jaw dropped into my bowl of chips. No matter how good or bad things are going for us, our memories are always intact. They are travel companions, long lost friends, and places that are long gone. 

Many times throughout the day, I like to just kick back and reflect on all the people I’ve met so far in my life. Each person has a story to tell and an experience unique only to them. I think about the laughs we shared, the sorrows we empathized, and those moments of comfortable silence between us. I think about the places we’ve been and about the places we planned to go. I hang on to these memories because they are usually all I have left. 

A few of my former friends can’t be reached as easily as before. I’ve moved to a few new states, and a few of them have moved as well. Sometimes relationships just break apart as people get older. No matter how it happened, it’s just life. Nowadays, the only thing I have left of those mythical people is a pocketful of memories. 

I don’t just remember the people who I’ve come across. I think about the simpler days when I was little, playing Nintendo and throwing fireballs at Bowser on Super Mario 64. I think about when I didn’t have to worry about the trivial things in life like calling phone companies and answering the doorbell, only to be greeted by a longwinded and rather unpleasant door-to-door salesman. I think back and compare 10 year old me to the 22 year old me. As a side note, my 22nd birthday was on October 5 and I made more memories to cherish for many days to come. I think about how I’m fundamentally the same person I’ve always been, although my worldview has changed a bit from experiencing new scenarios and new people. 

I remember a lot about my childhood, but sadly, some memories are blurry like a ship on the horizon that will never reach the shoreline. I often wonder about those lost memories as I try to remember how I felt on a particular day and how I reacted to certain life events. How would I ever recall my feelings, my joy, my boredom, or my sorrow? Well, here is the fun part. 

I’ve decided to go out and buy a journal. I used to keep one when I was in elementary school, but I (regretfully) threw it away after the kids in class found out and made fun of me for it. Ah, the cruelty of school children, eh? I want a journal with a lock and I’ll be the only person who knows how to break the code. I want to look back on my experiences ten years from now and re-live these days like they just happened five minutes before. 

If anything important happens on a particular day, I’ll jot down the date and everything right before I go to bed. I’ll paint pictures with words in excruciating detail. 

Starting today, not a single vital detail will be left out. I wonder what 28 year old Daevone will think about 22 year old Daevone. I’d love to see how much I’ve changed throughout the next few decades and maybe, just maybe, even millenniums. 

With that being said, what about you? Would you consider keeping a journal so you can remember the good times and the bad? The positive and negative people who taught you priceless life lessons? The taste of Mother’s homemade cake on a cloudy Sunday morning? That picnic in the park with the person you would turn out to marry?

“A man’s real possession is his memory. In nothing else is he rich, in nothing else is he poor.” 

Happy Halloween! 

Why You Should Run From Your Problems

2015/01/img_1332.jpg

It’s a dark day. Nothing has worked out, you’re on the brink of tears and saying it’s time to pack it up and move on. The weight has been too much to bear and you just can’t take any more. Those sleepless nights in bed, staring at the ceiling, wondering just what else you can do. If that sounds familiar, then this post is for you.

You want to run away, to flee from your problems and never return. It hurts to see your alcoholic mom passed out on the floor when you come home. The rent is due next week, but you don’t have the money to pay, and an eviction notice looms. You obeyed the road signs perfectly, but a car still smashed into yours, leaving you in a hospital for six months of therapy. And that doesn’t scratch the surface of the problems some of us go through. It usually starts out the same: white hot rage stews inside you and you throw things across the room. Maybe you punch a hole in the wall and scream at the top of your lungs for good measure. But after the anger comes the abysmal sadness. That feeling you’re alone, that no one cares, and there’s nothing you can do. The once angry eyes burn painfully with tears.

The pain builds up for days, sometimes weeks, and even years. You want to talk to someone about your problems, but you back out at the last second, with the fear of being judged. But one day you gather the courage and talk to someone about your problems. They nod and listen. The balloon in your chest deflates. This person tells you they know what you’re going through and gives you advice, but you’re offended. How could they possibly know what it’s like to be in your situation? You’re visibly frustrated and leave without warning while old wounds open once more.

We’ve all been there. Different people are faced with different challenges. During those dark periods, your mind is cloudy and the light at the end of the tunnel is dim. You can’t possibly tell anyone else about your problems; you tried that and it didn’t work. You’ve lost count of how many times you’ve banged your head against the wall.

You space out and think about leaving, running away. No one understands the struggle you go through and you ask yourself if anyone would miss you or notice you’re gone. Anything you’ve tried hasn’t worked, and this may be the only way. You pack a bag of clothes and necessities and throw it over your shoulder. You slam the front door shut and make your way down the street to an unknown destination. But something pulls at your mind and you stop at the end of the block. No. You can’t just give up, because the problem would never go away. With a devious brew of nerves and crippled confidence, you turn around and go home.

You make a plan. You mentally map out your journey; the steps you need to take, checkpoints you’re going to hit, and missions you have to accomplish to achieve your goals. Instead of packing your bags and leaving, you pack your bags mentally as you board the long yet rewarding train to the life you envision. You plan and dream, ignoring the voice of doubt in your head. This has to work, you’ve tried everything. After all, what more do you have to lose?

Days pass, months, and maybe a few years. Some days are filled with glee and progress, others not so much, but you carry on the fight with your goals in mind. You pack your bags for the “train” and it’s in full motion. At first, it seems like false hope, but as time passes by, the train travels further and you see a change of scenery outside your window. The landscape changes and the sun shines brighter and yes, the grass is greener.

The train eventually stops and you get off at your station. So much has changed since you made the decision to come aboard. Your life has changed for the better and you can start to live the way you’ve always dreamed. You stand at the station and collapse to the ground and roll with your fists clenched in victory and a smile that angels envy.

After everything you’ve been through; the pain, the insecurities, and the doubts, things are the way they should be. Aren’t you glad you didn’t surrender when it seemed impossible? Anything can happen when you pursue the reality you dream of and never give up.

Please share this post with anyone who has a problem. Together we can help each other overcome anything.

There is always a light at the end of the tunnel.

The Little Things That Count: On Scrapbooking, Collections, & Photographs

/home/wpcom/public_html/wp-content/blogs.dir/869/52326772/files/2014/12/img_0971.jpg

Life is a Rubik’s Cube. It’s a colorful, enticing, and seemingly simple yet wonderful phenomenon. One moment the days can feel like they will never end, and then come and go quicker than a hiccup. Continue reading

It Wasn’t Your Fault, I’m Sorry – A Rant

IMG_0258.JPG

I wrote a blog post about a year ago, in which I wrote that you were in complete control of your life and that anything that has happened to you has been your fault. A year has passed since then, and I’ve taken in a year’s worth of lessons and values in that time. I recently re-read that post and laughed at the sheer naïveté of it all. The laughter was then replaced with shame after realizing the errors I made and I would like to say I’m sorry, because I now realize that I was wrong.

Continue reading

What To Do When Your Motivation Has Dried Up

20140714-144158-52918498.jpg

I recently went through a rough patch with my writing. During the past month or so, I became lazy, disinterested, and flat out discouraged to write. But I didn’t know why. I’m sure we can all relate to that same feeling at one point or another in our lives. Maybe it wasn’t with writing. Maybe you’ve lost your passion, your drive and determination to keep going. If so, then strap on your seatbelt. This blog post is for you.

Continue reading

Why Curiosity Killed The Cat

20131204-153500.jpg

Curiosity killed the cat and out came a lion.

As a child, adults will often make one of those weird comments about how “You young whippersnappers are awfully curious”, and all we can do is giggle and smile back with our two missing front teeth. Children are commonly associated with curiosity, but every person on this planet is on their hands and knees, looking under rocks to find the truth. On one hand, our curiosity has led to countless advances in our everyday lifestyles. On the other hand, we’ve all heard that famous saying – “Curiosity killed the cat”.

Continue reading

Is Time Leaving You Behind?

20131201-132152.jpg

Are you chasing behind the train of time or are you sitting comfortably in a seat?

I’ve noticed many changes as I’ve gotten older, many of them big, many of them small. But one major change I’ve noticed is how life is changing for everyone around me. People are getting married, getting new jobs, moving across the country, trying to become billionaires, and I smile every time I see them making the progress they dream about. Speaking following dreams, I’ve noticed that as we get older, the days feel much shorter, and that leaves us scratching our heads, wondering where the time has gone. There are many days that I plan to do something, only to look at the clock flash 11:30 PM and say “You know what, I’ll do that tomorrow.”

The above phrase is all too familiar, it haunts me in my dreams and even when I’m awake. Maybe you’ve heard it as well, coming from yourself or from somebody else. That phrase is usually one of promises unfulfilled and tasks destined to be repeatedly set aside for a later date. Time moves much too quickly to make those kinds of souless commitments, and before we know it, we’re staring at a deadline that we could’ve sworn was months away. Sometimes it feels like life is moving us, we’re not moving with time. It feels like some kind of dastardly villain has hijacked our car, thrown us in the backseat, and is taking us wherever the hell he wants. It feels like we have no control over what lies ahead.

But what if I told you that you DO have control?

Every decision we ever make sets us up for the future in some way, shape, or form. The decisions you make today will form the possibilities you will meet tomorrow. Choosing to put off whatever is in front of you will only leave it unfinished for longer that in should be. We ultimately decide what we experience, and no one can take the power of choice away from us. Do you have a packed schedule and can’t call up an old friend to reconnect? Make time, make an arrangement with that friend to call them at 2 AM if you have to. Maybe you don’t have to do that, there are 24 hours in the day, surely you can find at least one of them to accomplish your goals, right? Right.

Whenever you feel you’ve lost control and that unruly crazy-eyed maniac called Time has thrown you in the backseat, remember that you’re the one with control. Reach over the driver’s seat, grab Time by the neck and thrown it in the backseat. You’re in control of your own life, so start driving and get where you want to go. Don’t let time move you, move with time.